Written By Mesha G. – Official Contributor of The Crowned Series
I’m incredibly late but since it was suggested in my Hulu app, I decided to finally watch Acrimony. This was a movie I wanted to see in theatre, but I honestly, I’m not the biggest movie person, so I always make the plan to go and never follow through with it. Regardless, I watched the Acrimony and I had the greatest inclination to write about it.
Acrimony is a story about a scorned woman named Mel. Mel nurtures a man basically from the day they met until she decided to divorce him. This man happened to be draining in every single capacity; he found ways to use all of her inheritance from her mom’s passing by purchasing a car, financing his last year in college, paying for things he broke around the house and anything else that came up. He didn’t help her financially, he didn’t support their household, and truly lived off the dream that one day his research and invent of a battery will work. It also doesn’t help that her family didn’t support the idea of their relationship, let alone marriage, so there was the constant reminders with the vibes of “he ain’t shit” from her sisters.
So they divorced, and the battery idea actually paid off and he gives Mel a check for $10 million and buys back her mom’s home that was foreclosed on because she couldn’t keep up with the bills. Mel didn’t think that that was enough especially after she saw that he was with the lady that he cheated on her with toward the beginning of their relationship. Mel became crazy obsessive with her ex-husband’s new relationship, so much so that she killed herself being revengeful towards him.
Although there was a lot dramatization in the movie, it reminded me of real life. I empathize with Mel. I personally never invested as much as she did in a person but I know the feeling of giving someone your all and for whatever reason, it ends up not working. Your investment doesn’t pay off throughout all of the loyalty, support, and unconditional love; what you did just doesn’t muster what you thought that it should be. The movie chucks this up as a woman with a mental illness, which I wholeheartedly find fault with. And Mel was villainized for her feelings
As I realize I am no relationship coach, I did think of a few viable takeaways that we as women should think of when jumping into relationships (and staying until we’re scorned).
- Relationships are two-way streets. Teddy Pendergrass says it best, not 70/30, not 60/40, but talkin’ bout a 50/50 love. Relationships should be give and take – it’s toxic to be a giver and never receive anything in return. AND conversely, it’s just as toxic as hell to be a receiver and never a giver. Mel was an incredible giver and her husband was a user. He also used his new wife but her “pay off” was way quicker than Mel’s.
- Potential has an expiration date. We all date with expectation of what someone will be. We anticipate how this person will be as a spouse, a parent, and a partner because there’s a little uncertainty how this person will be in the future. I know you probably have seen a ton of IG quotes that say don’t fall in love with someone’s potential, but I feel like that’s impossible…it does take some vision to anticipate how this person you’d want your potential spouse to be.
- My last point is more of a rhetorical question when is enough, enough?
- I ask this question because how much do we as women have to tolerate, have to suffer with, have to ride for before people see the value in us, or even for us to see the value in ourselves?
It was hard for Mel to move on because of how much time, effort, LOVE, and money she spent with Richard, had she not stayed as long as she did, I really truly do believe she would have had the capacity to live a normal, healthy life.
I’m not exactly sure of what is the message that Tyler Perry and his team wanted to portray in this movie. But if we as the audience were to look at Mel as the villain of the story; he didn’t win me over with the anti-black woman rhetoric.
– Mesha G., Official Contributor of The Crowned Series